P.T. and The Itch

yes, i do have "the itch" to run. but i'm not addressing THAT itch, here.

it's been a little while since i've posted. i know my faithful FEW friends (who COMMENT) might wonder what's-a-goin' on...and then there's the fam members who LURK (yet DON'T comment) who prob don't even know what's goin' on...

well, i've been to p.t. 3 times now.
day 1, WED. was great. got ULTRASOUND on the sore spots! have you ever? this is weird. there's "THE ultrasound" that you get at about 20 wks prego. THAT'S the only ultrasound i knew of. this was different. duh. it was this machine that sends SOMETHING (ultrasound) deep penetrating to the deep muscle. if you feel a dull ache, then it's getting the bone and that's too deep. this is SO foreign to me. felt like nothing. i expected heat or SUMPIN. nothin. but i'm trusting it's working.
he gave me this band to do these leg exercises with; wall sits; orders to ice. no orders to stop running. just stop if the pain worsened on the run.

THURS i'm doing the stretching exercises w/ the band. SOMEWHERE in the course of this day, i develop this weird ITCHING. i'm itching all over my body. i notice it doesn't go away. it's irritating but i'm thinking....what is this? it will go away tomorrow.

p.t. day 2, FRI. i wake up and the itching is not gone. i take a generic benadryl and start my run. the itching was unBEARable at home but thought the run would take my mind of it.
i ran around and ended up down at p.t.
2.44 miles, 20+minutes. pretty dang-darn sore when i got there. that was the point. on WED when i'd shown up "cold" it was weird cuz i was talking about how much PAIN i was experiencing, yet, i wasn't in much pain at that moment. so, FRI., showing up WARM, i was in pain and it was more real. he does some pressing and massaging-type stuff. hurts pretty bad. BUT yknow the weird thing? now that i'm thinking it's not a stress fracture, my brain doesn't associate the pain w/ the breaking of bones...instead my brain is thinking, this is MUSCLE pain. it's more bearable. it's a psychological thing.

we talked about the itchy stuff. no conclusions. just weird, eyebrow-raised looks. of course, i'm feeling the effects of the antihistamine and so not too itchy. kind of thinking, "perhaps it's in my head??" i hope he doesn't think the same thing.

he ices at the end. tries different exercise things and balance things. he's just this young kid in p.t. school. he's an intern at the place i'm going. he's apart from his wife for this internship, while she's on campus, still studying. they're about 3 1/2 hours apart. wow. real nice KID! (i feel so old.) but wouldn'tchya know i'd find out about his life? course.

he says, let's back off the running and allow time for this thing to HEAL naturally. let's not AGGRAVATE it any more. fine. i'm cool with it. this week i've been thinking, "oK, maybe i'll shoot for a FARTHER-IN-THE-FUTURE marathon. it's okay." deeeep breaths. etc.

well, over the wkd, we were a very busy fam. and the ever-present ITCHING. oh.my.word. what is the fuh-LIPPING deal????? grief! oh. my. i'm in agony. when i scratch: long, raised, red lines appear on my skin. sometimes bumps. like hives. and i'm WRACKING my brain to go over all the things i've put in my body, TOUCHED, put ON my body...WHAT COULD BE DOING THIS???

somehow, w/ all that, i didn't do too much of at-home p.t.

is it the alleve and ibuprofen i've been using?? since september, max? could i already have liver damage? no way. is it the band? am i SUDDENLY allergic to latex? but i haven't even USED the band since thurs. no WAY am i touching that thing. so, after many showers and baking soda bath...should it still be affecting me? don't think so.

i used a hair gel that was in my med.cab. that i haven't used in months. could that be it? i threw it away, posthaste. we had recently changed deoderants. costco (come ON) doesn't have the big pack of DEGREE any more. i just buy those every coupla months and brad and i BOTH use them. (but diff. containers as he always leaves ONE STRAY armpit hair on the top. so i would have to use my FINGERNAIL and scrape it off b4 using! God forbid i get one of his HAIRS on me! so i have a hair fetish. it's not news. it's not a secret. it's not BAD that i share that. i don't even have readers for cryin-in-a-mud-puddle!) ANYhoo, the co quit degree and i had to buy DOVE! gasp! (btW: brad switched to something more manly. not than degree. degree was very manly. yet WOmanly and sporty for me. but dove?: not manly.) SO, immed. i quit that dove stuff. went right out to walmart and tried to find my good ole degree. course, couldn't find it. but got whatever degree i could find. looked for SANS fragrance but they ALL have it. ("parfum") ah well. i was using it a FEW DAYS AGO, surely i'm not SUDDENLY allergic to IT!

criminy! what is going on here? still itching.

so, today, p.t. day 3 MON: i thought this morning, outta the shower, that there were fire ants swarming all over my head. i'm starting to sweat. having to restrain myself from scratching my scalp. i try to focus on something else. the itch abates. but it DOES something to my NERVES!
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhh

he has me start out on the treadmill. okay. folks. you know me by now, right? you KNOW my DREAM IN LIFE is to get on a treadmill, in SHORTS, already sweating out of the shower cuz of my nervous itching feeling, IN FRONT OF (literally) A LITTLE YOUNG BOY....and run. please? could i?

okay. don't worry about that young boy BEHIND you. just run. you're outside. PRETEND. you're outside. this is just a normal run. oh yeah, except for the fact that THE ONLY SOUND IS OF YOUR puh-OUNDING footsteps and your HEAVY breathing. aaaakkk.

btw: this kid is super nice and very professional.

he didn't think i overpronate that bad. we did that balance thing. he did that EXCRUCIATING deep muscle massage thing. more ice. he gave me new things to do SANS band-thing. thank God. and no lunges, or the like. cuz of knee pain when doing them. but there are wall squats to strengthen those muscles around the knee.

there was some discussion in the office today...and conferring amongst therapists about the itching thing. no conclusions. need MORE prayers.

aren't i a mess? what is it? the running? the move? help!

cast your burdens...on Jesus...for He cares...for you!

ps: i called mr little boy therapist guy. (okay, his name is Joe and he's really great. he deserves a name, huh?) Joe says i can go out and walk. "for one, two, three, even four miles...as long as it doesn't intensify the pain." so i'm going out for a walk tomorrow. k? maybe it won't be so bad. i crave a run. i'm sure i am not the same person i was 6 months ago. i have never craved a run. in my life. but here's my new life. and it itches.